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How to use a vibrator

Using a vibrator correctly

Vibrators are a valuable and fun tool to have in your arsenal. But if you’re new to the world of vibrators, it can be hard to know where to start looking. There’s so much variety to choose from! You might be wondering, “How do I use a vibrator? How do I even pick one?”

We’re here to help cut through the noise and tell you what you need to know about how to choose the right vibrator for you, how to use it, and how to clean your vibrator before storing it between uses. Let’s get started!

Are vibrators safe to use?

Yes! Vibrators are perfectly safe to use as long as you follow these guidelines:

Choose a vibrator that’s body safe.

  • Buy your vibrator from a reputable seller.
  • Keep your vibrator clean.
  • Use it for its intended purpose.
  • Is it healthy to use a vibrator?

Yup! In fact, vibrators can actually be a valuable tool to improve your sex life. Using a vibrator can help you discover what feels good for you during solo and partnered sex. During solo sex, this gives you the chance to experiment and explore without the pressure, expectations, and shyness that can come with experimenting with a partner.

In turn, this leads to more satisfying partnered sex. Using a vibrator during partnered sex can improve your pleasure, which makes for a good time and can boost your bond.

Since the purpose of a vibrator is to help you orgasm, some say that vibrators are actually good for your health.

Studies have shown that having orgasms on a regular basis can improve your mental health, overall mood, improve your sleep, keep your heart healthy, reduce stress hormones, and can even help relieve period cramps. More orgasms mean a healthier you! So go ahead and enjoy yourself.

Choosing the right vibrator

Now that we’ve cleared up any concerns about safety and health, it’s time to help you choose the vibrator that’s best for you.

Vibrators come in several different types and a huge variety of sizes, shapes, styles, and colors. While shopping, think about what kind of stimulation you like and want and choose a vibrator made to provide a similar sensation.

Keep in mind that some vibrators have a single speed setting, while others have multiple settings or even rhythm options. Higher-end vibrators tend to have more speed and rhythm options, but that’s not always true.

If being able to play with different vibrations is important to you, keep an eye out for that while you shop.

Here’s a summary of the main types to get you started!

Internal vibrators

These are inserted into the vagina – think vibrating dildos, wands, and long cylindrical-shaped vibrators. These are a great option if you enjoy penetration and G-spot stimulation.

External vibrators (sometimes called massagers)

These are used on the clitoris and labia, rather than being inserted into the vagina. These are useful if you prefer no penetration, or if you want to add clitoral stimulation during penetrative sex. They can be used in tandem with an internal vibrator or to supplement penetrative sex with a partner.

External vibrators come in a wide range of shapes and designs. Every body is different, so every design feels different from person to person. It can take a bit of experimentation to find the right option for you. If you’re unsure where to start, think about what kind of stimulation, motion, and positions you like during solo and partnered sex. You’re likely to enjoy a vibrator that provides similar stimulation to that.

Of course, there’s no reason why you can’t try a completely unfamiliar style of vibrator to experiment with a different type of stimulation. But we recommend starting with an external vibrator you’re confident you’ll like. It’s always nice to have an old standby you can rely on through thick and thin.

Combination vibrators

And, of course, some vibrators do both at the same time, combining internal and external stimulation. These are the rabbit-style vibrators. They look like dildos, but have an added arm, allowing them to stimulate the G-spot and clitoris at the same time. If you enjoy internal penetration but also need external stimulation to orgasm, this is the way to go.

Anal vibrators

These differ from regular internal vibrators because they have a special flared base. This is to make sure you’re always able to retrieve an anal vibrator without it getting stuck inside you. Never use a vibrator for anal play unless it’s specifically designed for it and has a flared base for safety!

Penis-focused vibrators

These are lesser-known members of the vibrator family. The most commonly known is the vibrating cock ring. These are useful for partnered sex or solo sex for people with penises. They’re mostly used for those who struggle with arousal or who want added stimulation during sex.

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What materials are safe for vibrators?

It’s pretty simple: stick with body-safe materials. That means body-safe silicone and ABS plastic. Both are non-porous (meaning they don’t absorb bacteria), and they’re easy to sterilize for your safety. Silicone tends to be more expensive than plastic, but is silky and pleasant to the touch. Certain metals like gold and silver are also safe, but they tend to be more expensive.

Most importantly, avoid any vibrators that have a soft, squishy, jelly-like texture. Toys like that are porous and can’t be fully sterilized. They hold onto bacteria, which means they’re not safe for your body.

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Setting the mood

Now that you have your vibrator chosen and ready to go, it’s time to try it out! Grab your lubricant, and your lingerie, and let’s get started.

 

Lubricants

While you don’t technically always need lubricant, you’ll almost always want it when you’re using a toy. Even if you’re sticking to external vibrators, a good lubricant helps your toy glide across your skin and can help heighten sensations. Never use an oil-based lube with a silicone or plastic toy! Use a water-based lube instead.

Lingerie

Wear what makes you feel beautiful, sexy, and comfortable in your own skin. For some people, that means a full set of color-coordinated lingerie or a mesh bodysuit. For others, it means loose-fitting loungewear that gives you plenty of freedom of movement. It’s all about how you feel.

 

Getting Down to Business

We recommend dimming the lights and lighting a few candles to set the mood and get you into the right headspace for sex. Do what relaxes you – whether that’s taking a warm bath, reading erotica, turning on your sexy playlist, or just kicking back and letting your mind wander. Take your time, and do what makes you feel comfortable and sensual.

It might take some time for you to get used to your vibrator’s settings and controls. Maybe the vibrations aren’t quite what you expected. Be patient with the process and experiment with what feels good. Every new toy has a learning curve, but the end result and the fun getting there is totally worth it.

How to clean a vibrator

When you’re done, be sure to clean your vibrator before putting it away. How you clean any given sex toy depends on what it’s made of, whether it uses batteries, and whether it has any parts that can’t be washed. Quality sex toys come with cleaning and storage guidelines. Be sure to read those every time you get a new toy, and follow them carefully. For instance, some toys can be boiled to clean them, or can be run through the dishwasher, while others can’t.

When in doubt, use warm soapy water (or a special toy cleaner from a reputable source) and dry them thoroughly after every use. Toys can accumulate dust or other debris if they’re stored unprotected. Most reputable toy companies include a storage bag or box for this purpose. If your vibrator came with one, we recommend using it. Either way, check your vibrator the next time you’re ready to take it for a spin. If it’s picked up some dust or fuzzies, give it a wash so it’s nice and clean when you use it.

Ready, set, go!

Now you have all the information you need to go wild and have fun with a vibrator! For your first vibrator, we recommend buying a relatively inexpensive (but still quality and body-safe) one you’re confident you’ll like.

Over time, it can be fun to branch out and experiment with other designs or types of stimulation. It’s a big world out there; go explore yourself!

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